Respect in Conflict Resolution

Respect in Conflict Resolution

As family law attorneys, we are involved in some of life’s biggest conflicts.  Conflict is normal and expected in family law matters.  After all, there is a dispute over a relationship of some kind or we wouldn’t be here.  When involved in a divorce, custody dispute or other matter, the parties are not expected to agree on everything.   However, when conflict is managed in a respectful and positive way using dignity and respect, positive feelings about the process and outcome are possible for both parties.  Even more surprising, the process can deepen the bond between people and families during this life change. 

Everyone needs to feel heard, supported and understood, especially when facing strong emotions triggered by conflict.  Fear and anger are normal and expected feelings when involved in family law disputes.  However, getting comfortable with these emotions and managing them in a respectful way will contribute to resolving the matter in a way that strengthens the changing family relationships post-conflict.

All of our perceptions are shaped by our experiences and our values.  These perceptions influence our approach to conflicts more than an objective view of the facts.  Instead of racing into volatile, hurtful, and angry reactions, what if we tried to remain calm and use non-defensive, respectful reactions?  When people are treated with value and respect they are more likely to give it.

Here are a few tips:

Be Considerate – how we conduct ourselves during times of conflict can make a difference in the outcome.

Be Flexible – try to adapt to shifting conditions when appropriate. When things do not happen as planned, adapt.

Be Open – the other side may have an unconventional idea to solve the problem.

Demonstrate Mutual Respect – you may not share the same position but be willing to show consideration and recognize the other person’s value.

Look for Common Ground – maybe there are things you can agree at the beginning to start the negotiation process off on a positive note.

Communicate Respectfully – it’s not what you say, but how you say it. If you choose your words, tone and demeanor carefully, your point will be clearer and easier to receive.

Practice Patience and Share Points of View – take the time to get the full story and understand each other’s perspective.

Lead by Example – if you treat the proceedings and other party with dignity and respect, it will be easier for others to follow.

There is a lot to consider when entering into a family law matter. It is important to pick a process that fits your family situation and a professional that will initiate and continue the negotiation with an approach consistent with your goals.  Because we focus solely on family law, we understand the dynamics, believe in a respectful approach to the process and can help guide you through the process.

Contact Elise Buie Family Law Group, PLLC.

STAY UP TO DATE

Subscribe to our newsletters

 
Subscribe to one or more of our newsletters, delivering meaningful insight on topics that matter to you and your family.
ebl home subscribe image

FURTHER READING

Latest Blog Posts

If you and your partner reside in Washington state and are unmarried, you each might qualify for the legal protections availed to you by law by classifying your relationship as a committed intimate relationship.

One of the greatest gifts you can give your family is to build an estate plan while you are alive and well. Estate planning allows you to formally communicate your wishes so they will not be up for interpretation by…

A co-executor can help facilitate the distribution of assets, minimize conflicts, and provide much-needed support to grieving families.

The law makes it easy for people to get out of bad marriages. Washington, like most states, acknowledges no-fault divorce. This means that if you want a court to dissolve your marriage, all you have to do is file for…

Washington state’s laws on non-marital relationships, including committed intimate relationships (CIRs), can be convoluted, especially in the absence of a cohabitation agreement. Given the ambiguity that exists for unmarried partners in Washington state, thinking about the future and what it could look like is more important than ever. This is especially true in terms of aging, incapacity, and death. Fortunately, you can address each of these issues in a comprehensive estate plan.

Prenups and postnups can strengthen a marriage, given how they require relationship partners to put their cards on the table for each other to see, offering transparency and peace of mind. Despite their similarities, there are a few significant differences between the two.

Child support is one of the most contentious issues in divorce cases where parties have minor children. Even though Washington state law uses the same complex mathematical formula to determine the amount of child support for each child, there is…

Family law and estate planning often intersect. This is particularly true when contemplating divorce, remarriage, or blending families.

At some point during your divorce case, friends and family members whose own marriages ended in divorce probably told you that it gets better, and it does. Of course, from your perspective, getting out of a bad marriage might be…

Co-parenting over a long distance when you are a non-residential parent does not have to equate to sacrificing involvement in your children’s lives. But it likely does mean you will have to make tweaks in your communication and parenting style to accommodate the new living arrangement.