Are You Sure You Want a Divorce?

A child stressed about parents arguing in the background
Divorce isn’t something that anyone “wants” but it is frequently presented as a solution to insolvable marital issues. Divorce can be expensive, emotionally draining, and acrimonious. Sometimes divorce really is the best choice, but it is important to consider a few important factors when grappling with the decision to divorce
 
.     1.        What is your familial situation?
 If you have kids, divorce is by no means the end of communication with your spouse. It’s really the beginning of a whole new type of communication wherein you both are expected to navigate raising your children from a place of mutual understanding and respect. This can be incredibly difficult following a divorce. It is also important to think about the potential negative repercussions for your children if you of remain in a doomed marriage. What type of behavior is being modeled for your children? Are they witnessing severe arguing or a general sense of distain between you and your spouse? Divorce can be the best choice if children are being subjected to unhealthy emotional behavior.  Every child has different needs so it is important to assess in advance how to best support your children and their relationship with the other parent before actually getting divorced. 

2.         Have you sincerely tried to fix the problem(s)?
 Have you and your spouse attended marriage counseling? If not, that is a great place to start. It is also very important to recognize that the issues in a marriage are never entirely one person’s fault. To varying degrees, you both have inevitably contributed to the issues you face today. Taking responsibility for you actions and being accountable for your behavior in the future is the only healthy way to move forward, divorce or not. Do not leave stones unturned that you may regret later.
 
3          How will you handle the aftermath?
 How will divorce impact your financial situation? Here it is crucial to understand your legal rights in regards to child support and spousal maintenance. Do you and your spouse share debt? How will this be divided? In the scenario of divorce, can either of you afford to remain the family home? What does this mean for your children or schools? Do you and your potential ex spouse have similar values regarding the quality of childcare and education? Public or private school? Nanny or daycare?
 
This list is not exhaustive and every situation presents its own unique challenges but these are just a few fundamental questions to ask yourself if divorce is something you’re considering.

 Contact Elise Buie Family Law Group, PLLC if you would like to discuss your divorce options or your “stay together” options as well.

STAY UP TO DATE

Subscribe to our newsletters

 
Subscribe to one or more of our newsletters, delivering meaningful insight on topics that matter to you and your family.

FURTHER READING

Latest Blog Posts

As a co-parent during or following divorce, you may no longer have the authority to make certain unilateral decisions regarding your children’s health and well-being. The restrictions on making decisions unilaterally are most commonly related to matters that are considered…

The decision to move forward with a divorce is often a difficult one. The end of a marriage can affect your perspective on the memories you have from the relationship, as well as your expectations for the future. Divorce can…

Choosing fiduciaries is crucial to estate planning. In any one estate plan, there could be a variety of roles that a fiduciary might fill, such as an executor, agent, or trustee. It need not be a person either; a fiduciary…

                  Raising teenagers can be difficult under any circumstances, but add divorce to what can already be a difficult time in child's life and many parents feel find themselves grasping. We have gathered some of the most important things you can do as a parent to help your teenager man...

A revocable trust or living trust is an instrument created, as part of your overall estate plan, for the purpose of protecting your assets, including investments, during your lifetime. It can also allow for a smoother transition of said assets…

A prenup can take many of the “what ifs” off the table in the event of divorce. What is separate property, who might have to maintain life insurance, and who will keep the heirloom piano that’s been passed down for…

Many people find it challenging to get started with estate planning. From confusion about the process to denying that estate planning is necessary, there are various reasons why people do not want to create an estate plan. That said, estate…

After divorce, it is common to experience feelings of shame. That shame could arise from multiple sources, including feeling that you let your spouse or children down or because you are worried about what others may think of you. Regardless…

Estate planning can feel overwhelming, but it is necessary to ensure your assets are in order and your loved ones are taken care of. Establishing an estate plan can also make certain issues easier for you and your family during…

In Washington state, alimony is referred to as maintenance. Maintenance is court-ordered spousal support payments that one spouse makes to assist with the living expenses of the other spouse for a period of time and for a particular purpose.  Maintenance…