Divorce Teaches Us What is Important

 Divorce isn’t happy but divorce can teach us all a whole heck of a lot about happiness. For better or worse, divorce is one of the quickest ways to find out what is important to you. Negotiating a separation from a life partner really puts things into perspective regarding the fragility and unpredictability of life.

Often what feels important in life are actually the ways in which we define ourselves by our roles, degrees, jobs, race, gender, etc.  For example, a woman may believe that the most important things in her life are her medical degree, her spouse, and her children. What happens when one or more of those things are lost?  What happens when you no longer have a spouse? Or you lose your job or change career paths? Now how will you define what holds importance? Are YOU no longer important? We feel important when we are needed or desired and divorce can completely turn all of this on its head.

Divorce can strip you down to the core emotionally. In times like these the true angels in your life will appear to support you. Those who you may have previously thought were important fixtures in your life fall by the wayside as you are faced with the reality of who actually turns up in times of need. Often times in divorce, there are children who need you. They need your comfort, your guidance, and your assurance that everything will be all right. They are important. Last but not least, you are important. Divorce is a symbol of the loss of a life partner and it can be incredibly daunting to approach life solo but hold onto the knowledge that the most important the in your life is yourself. You deserve every moment of care and reprieve that you give yourself and probably much more. Self-care is a trendy phrase these days but there is no circumstance in which it is more applicable than in a divorce.

STAY UP TO DATE

Subscribe to our newsletters

 
Subscribe to one or more of our newsletters, delivering meaningful insight on topics that matter to you and your family.

FURTHER READING

Latest Blog Posts

If you are getting divorced, you may be worried about what it will do to your finances. Maybe your finances are heavily intertwined with your spouse’s, or you are worried about what your future will look like, given these changes.…

Establishing paternity and parentage is important for many families and parents. Regardless of why you want to establish paternity and parentage, the process has the potential to be confusing, especially if you are unfamiliar with the terms and rules for…

After divorce, you may find yourself living on one less stream of income than you did when you were married and want to find a way to make up for it. Or even if you didn’t lose any income by…

If you are in the process of getting remarried, a prenuptial agreement may be the last thing on your mind. It should be at the forefront of it, however, as it can be beneficial for you, your spouse, and, if…

As a mom of four (now adult) kids, I remember well the flood of emotions that came each time they went to my ex’s, especially during the early days of my separation and eventually after my divorce. Not only was…

The holidays can look much different during a divorce than they did only a year earlier, and the changes can take some getting used to. The challenge is that you have to start somewhere, and in these “newer” moments, it…

You can use Collaborative Law to support your process of creating and negotiating a prenup with your partner.

In Washington state, if you are involved in a custody dispute, which involves difficult questions related to specific needs for your children or serious parenting deficits (such as mental health, substance abuse, or domestic violence), an evaluation service may be…

Apologizing can be hard, especially if you have a contentious relationship with the person you are apologizing to. If you want to have a polite (even friendly) relationship with your ex in the future, though, owning up to and apologizing…

In the same way that every divorce is different, so, too, is every divorce lawyer and the law firms where they work. From lawyers’ individual personalities, expertise, and experience to law firms’ varying cultures and values which provide the framework…