Sacred Cows of Marriage and Divorce

Google has been known to investigate some very strange areas. One couple who works for the company has decided to tackle the research on divorce and see if it really holds water. People throw around statistics about marriage and divorce all the time, but Astro Teller (yes, that’s his name) says that many of the statistics are flawed.

In his new book, Sacred Cows: The Truth about Divorce and Marriage, he identifies seven “sacred cows” of marriage and divorce that can keep people trapped in a marriage that isn’t healthy:


  • The Holy Cow: Marriage is always good and divorce is always bad.
  • The Expert Cow: All marital problems can be fixed with the right self-help book or marriage counselor.
  • The Selfish Cow: Everyone who gets divorced is selfish and everyone who stays married is selfless.
  • The Defective Cow: If you cannot make your marriage happy, or if you choose to divorce, you must be defective in some way.
  • The Innocent Victim Cow: Children’s lives are ruined by divorce.
  • The One True Cow: Finding true love should be your highest goal in life unless you’re married, in which case you should stop believing in love.
  • The Other Cow: Nobody should be allowed to leave a marriage in order to be with a new partner.

In his final analysis, we don’t have enough hard scientific data to prove that any of these ideas about marriage and divorce are true. Instead, each partner and family unit has their own unique circumstances that must be taken into account, and society should take that into account instead of jumping to one of the sacred cows.


Do you agree or disagree? We will reserve judgment, at least until we read the book more thoroughly, but if you would like some recommend resources we have for marriages and divorces, we have a booklist on our website. You can find out more at this link.


Do you need divorce advice? Contact Elise Buie Family Law Group, PLLC for a free and confidential consultation.

STAY UP TO DATE

Subscribe to our newsletters

 
Subscribe to one or more of our newsletters, delivering meaningful insight on topics that matter to you and your family.

FURTHER READING

Latest Blog Posts

There are various ways to plan for the handling of your remains after death, as we discussed in Part I of “How to Handle Remains in Washington State.” What option you choose will likely turn on some combination of your…

Death is a part of life. Like taxes, there's no avoiding it. Also, like taxes, you may not like thinking or talking about the subject. However, if you think about death and how to handle your remains from a planning…

Every child deserves love, stability, and consistency. Is there a child in your life that you have considered adopting, perhaps because they are the child of your spouse or a child you are fostering? Perhaps there is an adult in…

The thought of losing your home or its contents in a disaster is a scary thought. Loss of life, destruction of irreplaceable items such as home movies, photos, and heirlooms make it unconscionable. But as we know in life, sometimes…

Spoiler alert: If you’re doing everything around the house (or at work) because you’re living (working) with a bunch of incompetent fools, or so they’ve led you to believe they are, you’re being manipulated. So pervasive is this phenomenon, there’s…

If you've created an estate plan, you've already spent a good deal of time thinking about what will happen to you if you become sick, incapacitated, or die, including where you will go (literally) when you die. After all, you don't want your…

If you're 18 or older and live in Washington State, you can legally change your name to anything you want as long as you're not doing so to commit fraud. For example, if your goal is to change your name to evade…

Your estate plan should ensure your special needs child experiences the best quality of life they can, that the assets upon which they will rely will last as long as possible during their lifetime, and that their eligibility for public services will be maximized. Learn more.

Popular culture is using the moniker "America's daughter" to describe Gabby Petito because she could've been any of our daughters. Learn how to talk to your daughter about the signs of domestic abuse.

When a couple decides to divorce, and one spouse is unable to support themselves, spousal support becomes a hot-button issue. Learn how to mitigate conflict and move forward.